While making scrambled eggs today, I realize my cooking style is a hybrid of Gordon Ramsey and Paula Deen. I also realized that scrambled eggs have a point where they’re really gross. It’s the point right before they become safe to eat and start solidifying but get all slimy and liquid. It’s like some kind of inappropriate fluid from a thing of not of this world. Perhaps this is the exhumed residue of the thing that should not be. On an unrelated note ‘The Thing That Should Not Be’ is one of my favorite Metallica songs. I would squarely put it in my top five. I usually hum this song to myself when I’m cooking anyway so perhaps this is what has warped my mind when it comes to scrambling eggs.